Mi casa es tu casa: help, Cristiano Malgioglio interviews himself for two hours

Wonderful. This we would like to exclaim during My home is your homethe new program presented by Cristiano Malgioglio every Wednesday in prime time of Rai 2. Five episodes planned, of which the first premiered on December 7th. The intention was perhaps to inaugurate the Immaculate Conception with brio. Unfortunately, the mission failed. The homage to Raffaella Carrà is everywhere, right from the opening theme. As it could not be otherwise, given that the format would like to be the heir of You start counting, the roadside talk show that saw Raffa Nazionale behind the wheel.

“When you arrive, the TV changes color”, that is the blessing that the star of Carramba would have bestowed on Malgioglio in a phone call a few days before his disappearance. Or at least that’s what he says. And the show’s main problem is all here: the landlord talks (with himself), overflows, overflows and the guest, in this case Heather Parisi, is dominated by words, by unsolicited personal anecdotes, ending up robbing her of time to tell her story. A slow-motion robbery that lasts for more than two hours and that steals attention even for the viewers themselves. Let’s see in detail what derailed the first one man show, it couldn’t be defined any other way but don’t take it as a compliment, by Cristiano Malgioglio.

Basically, Heather Parisi made the 12-hour flight from Hong Kong, where she has lived with her husband and two children for about ten years, to give the conductor a lucky candle and then have a coffee with him that she herself would have named ” torture”. The rest of the time the two spend talking is nothing that couldn’t be resolved privately with one or more long distance calls. Malgioglio immediately says, “I’m a superstar” and that’s it. He asks very mild questions (the right one about world peace was missing) which, by the way, he answers by himself. There are countless times when the guest can barely pronounce the first syllables of a response because the landlord interrupts, leg outstretched, with an “extraordinary” personal anecdote starting from the feral: “Me, for example…”. Me me me me. Has it ever been said that this show takes “me”?. Yes, Christian.

And that’s it, wrapped in this vortex of self-referentiality, which Malgioglio also misses which could be interesting. The atmosphere is domestic and no one would invite a person “home” to skin them, of course. But Cristiano doesn’t make a fuss even when Heather manages to confide the impossible to him: “Nothing ever happened between me and Lorella Cuccarini, we write every day via Instagram!”. Had he been a commentator on any other show, we’re pretty sure Malgioglio would have exploded at least in a roaring, “Come on, who believes, darling?” Instead, deathly silence. While Cuccarini, through the Ig story, expresses deep disagreement with this statement through emoji. A bit like all of us at home, after all. And anyway, Parisi doesn’t even follow her “Nemicamatissima” on Instagram. We are clamoring for a corrective interview by Fagnani in Belve.

Many of us love Cristiano Malgioglio as a commentator for the Eurovision Song Contest. There, Malgy’s character found her perfect dimension: a disturbing element while Gabriele Corsi and Carolina Di Domenico kept the bar straight. We liked to hear him “hyena”, as he called the Spanish competitor “a discounted version of Jennifer Lopez” (a phrase that, among other things, infuriated the entire Iberian nation with consequent deep apologies from Cristiano who accompanied her. But , however, he said so). What happened to all that improvised treachery? The synthesis property of the jab that in four words could blow up any wretch? Perhaps it was impoverished precisely because of the lack of live coverage that made the maestro lose his irresistible spontaneity.🇧🇷 Armed, self-referring to manic levels, not inclined to listen. You start counting and then I’ll take care of it.

If it is true that there were intense moments like the memory of Raffaella Carrà and Stefania Rotolo of Cocktail d’Amore (with the surprise entrance of her daughter), the television performance was hampered by the presenter’s personality: once again, it does not take long to ask Parisi for a memory of Carrà, which soon begins with the autobiography: “You know, Raffaella and I talked a lot about you. He thought you were exceptional. We said that just one night in particular, I remember, we were talking about it with Renato Zero”. Between the forced and tireless listening to her songs and the many photos framed around the house with Italian but above all international stars, there’s a lot of Malgioglio in this show🇧🇷 Even her ten cats (named Lady Gaga, Cher, Barbra, and so on) try to escape Alcatraz. In vain. However, it’s an excellent deal for Heather who, not very willing to open up, managed to spend two hours on Italian TV (which she doesn’t know, she says) without giving anything away. Hat.

The much-heralded guest of Sam Ryder, the British singer who finished runner-up in the last Eurovision Song Contest and for whom Malgioglio has always shown an overbearing crush, was little more than a con man for the artist’s new single. Time to show us, in scandalous playback, that Ed Sheeran, unfortunately, doesn’t write all the songs and off we go, we say goodbye after hastily sharing (just editing?) a parmigiana with Malgy.

Next week we will find Ilona Staller at Malgioglio’s house: if the figure of management remains unchanged (and it will remain so), there will still be rivers of words, yes, but only on one side. Also because everything else is Noise, unfortunately not what Raffaella sang. Just background noise.